For this example I’m going to use women at a bar. I will be going into lots of other techniques for non-bar pickups too but for now, we’ll stick with this.
(Note: In fact, I even recommend you try my top places for picking up that are not bars – they are WAAAAAAAY better than ANY bar and you’ll see a massive leap in your success rates with women.)
As you know, women don’t usually go to bars on their own. They go in groups.
Approaching GROUPS of women can be extremely daunting and if you don’t know what you’re doing, you can fail BADLY with groups and like a pack of wolves they can rip you apart. I’ve seen men get cussed at, totally ignored and even drinks poured over them.
But if you do the approach RIGHT, then your success with a group of women can usually yield great results.
Whenever I suggest approaching groups of women I get LOADS of guys looking at me as though I’m from another planet. I realize that lots of guys probably don’t have the initial confidence to simply walk up to beautiful women they don’t know. Don’t worry, this can be easily solved.
Step 1. Walk around the shopping mall and when you catch a woman’s eye, smile at her – more often than not, she’ll smile back. To start with you can do this just with shop employees. Even if they don’t WANT to smile, they probably will. Good practice. And you might even brighten a few women’s lives a little.
Step 2. Once you’ve gained confidence in making natural eye contact and a smile with staff, you could move onto other women in the mall. I’m not suggesting big weird freak smiles, just nice, natural friendly ones. A lot of women will smile back at you.
Step 3. Here’s where it might seem a little weird, but this really does help and practice and repetition will make this lots easier. Just say “hi” with a smile to women (and men if you like) as you walk around the mall. It will feel HORRIBLE at first if you are not confident but slowly, after an hour or two, it’ll seem easy.
After you’ve smiled and said hi to 20 or 30 women, you should start to feel good (as long as you don’t quit on your first negative response – this will happen and will happen when you’re approaching women to pick them up – you HAVE to learn to step out of your comfort zone if you want to be successful with women).
One of my male friends did the “smile at girls in the mall” technique and he actually ended up meeting the girl of his dreams and is still with her 3 years later – how’s that for effective!
There are loads of other techniques you can do to build your confidence, most not quite as scary as the mall one. I go into others within my book…
Right, let’s assume you now have the confidence or at least the guts to approach women you don’t know in a bar (Again, I don’t just go into bar pickups in my book, in fact, I think the best places to pick up women are NOT in a bar – I think it’s everyday places where you’re not competing with other single guys).
Firstly, let’s suppose two girls are sat together at a bar. One is the ‘ugly’ one and one is the hot one (the one you like the looks of and would like to get to know more).
You see the girls. Go up to them and talk to them NOW! Don’t waste time. Within 3 seconds of seeing them, approach them. Some people call this the 3 second rule and I must say it really does seem to work.
If you see her and like her, it’s best not to think too much about the approach, or you’re more likely to work yourself into such a state that your approach will be ineffective or you’ll just pussy out altogether!
(Don’t worry I’ll tell you WHAT to say when you get there in a future lesson). So within 3 seconds, go TALK to her!
ALWAYS, ALWAYS approach a woman from the side or an angle from the front. !!!NEVER from behind – IMPORTANT!!!
If you go up to the group at the bar and approach from behind you will INSTANTLY invoke a negative response, and they will be put on the defensive - for obvious reasons. ALWAYS, ALWAYS, ALWAYS go in from the side...
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